Life gets hectic.
Sometimes swirling out of control, standing in the midst of stress and hundreds of to-do’s twisting around me. Facing a major move, loss of income, menopause, children moving in and out of our home, all I wanted to feel was boldness, ease and the Divine Feminine.
I pushed the pause button, took a day off! Literally declaring,
I am not doing this today. I have to take care of myself.
I sat in my favorite spot for meditation and reflection and asked, Here I am facing all these things that pull and tether me. How do I focus?
How can I stay bold when I’m so weary? How does the Divine Feminine play through me when I’m so stressed? How do I protect my relationships in this moment of anxiety?
As I meditated and wrote in my journal, I realized I already had the answers but they got lost in the emotional stress. Being still and purposeful about regaining my focus helped tremendously.
Here are a few practical things that got me and my family through a VERY stressful month.
1. You can trust the situation.
I have asked the universe for bigger and better things that come in smaller, simplistic packaging. Smaller housing with emphasis on work space. This means more creative time and less ‘chore’ time. I hate clutter. This was also a golden opportunity to purge things from my life that have weighed me down.
I also want more quality time with my family. This led us to the decision to live with our adult children instead of finding roommates. Sharing the financial burden of renting in one of the most expensive housing markets, is a good idea. Fortunately, I like all of our children and I’m pretty sure they like me.
Loss of income. I began to see it more of an opportunity than a misfortune. Losing a job can be disastrous, luckily, we were able to bounce back and keep going. Refocusing the type of work we were after to meet the desires of our creative nature becomes more and more our focus. Why spend countless hours working for someone else doing something you hate? Look for opportunity when doors close.
2. Focus on others good qualities instead of their “mistakes”.
When life is stressful it’s easy to lose patience and manners. We often take out our frustration on the ones who are closest to us. During our planned move, my daughter had moved into her own place. Due to mold, a week later, she moved back into our home. Imagine, packing to move, and while you’re struggling with purging, sorting, packing and cleaning, someone moves a one bedroom apartment into your home. We were busting at the seams. The stress level was off the charts. Yet I am happy to report, we managed to stay civil, kind and helpful to one another. She and I both were struggling with disappointment and tasks at hand that neither of us wanted to do. We made time for each other at the end of the day. Gathering outside on the patio for long talks, soaking in the moon light and encouraged each other to move forward the next day.
3. Stay focused on your desires, not your fears.
I sort of lose my mind when I don’t know where I am going to live. I don’t find it exciting or adventurous in the least. On top of the stress, trying to find a new home and new jobs, I’d struggle with anxiety attacks which triggered hot flashes. (Mothers, talk to your daughters about menopause and the symptoms. Save them the stress of thinking they are losing their minds!) This is a vicious cycle, hot flashes and stress just seem to feed on each other.
All I wanted was EASE… and to be an eskimo in the coldest climate possible.
After months of looking for a home, we slipped into a perfect situation. Even though we had only 10 days to vacate from our old place to somewhere new. This was ease. Looking back, I had tamed my worry and trusted the situation more, which made me feel at ease.
Focusing on desires helps motivate through the struggle. While things seem like they are crashing down around us, keeping your eye on the goal, will most likely result in a touchdown. I think I have finally learned, though life brings me challenges and struggles, I can stay focused, visualizing the result, based on the desires of my heart. Eventually, I will find myself there. Meanwhile, keeping my heart centered toward my desires keeps me at ease.
4. Stop ruminating about the past.
It’s difficult to move forward when you are constantly looking behind you. Let go of things that tether you. I really couldn’t see past the home I was living in. I couldn’t see that I would be comfortable in a new situation. I wanted things to stay the same, yet I didn’t. Holding on to the past locks me in place. Opportunities pass me by without noticing. Letting go of the past will free up emotional space for creativity and happiness to flow. When your mind is free of worry, it’s easier to successfully guide your steps to where you want to go. Don’t you think?
And for all of you who made it to the other side! CHEERS and big HIGH FIVE!!!